19 Jan 2010

Months ago I posted a blog on why women are so unhappy at work. I am still getting responses, even though most “older blogs” are put out to pasture by the end of the day they are conceived and birthed.


I have been thinking about why there is so much gloom and doom about getting up in the morning, going to a place where we are being asked to roll up our sleeves, produce and create, and then go home for an evening of feeling full and having been useful.


It’s not just women who are unhappy at work, it seems like there is an epidemic of malaise, and even desperation. What is making it so awful, this going to work thing?


First, many of the responses I have received to why women are so unhappy at work has an element of finger pointing at, you guessed right, the men. They are the ones who shut women out. They are the ones who play the most intense power games. They are the ones who keep the glass ceiling in place.


Next, it’s the economy, stupid! Sure this is playing into our distress. Not knowing if we can bring home the bacon makes the day more gloomy and frightening. We all know someone who has been recently downsized or someone who has been out of work for a long time. There are many able-bodied, productive individuals who want to work, and there is no place for them to use their skills and talents. Always fear, is that going to be me?


So, is there a pill we can take? Is there something we can do to be happy at work? For some of us the pattern is so deeply entrenched to play it safe, to be on constant guard to keep the wolf away from the door, that we will never be happy.


For the rest of us; DO THE OPPOSITE for a few days and see what happens. This is called a pattern interrupt. It is a way to engage the brain in a different manner and maybe, just maybe the doldrums will roll away.


If you are always first in to work, go in late. If you are always last in the door, go in early. If you always eat lunch at your desk, go to a restaurant and if you go out every day bring a salad and stay at your desk. If you tend to speak first at a meeting, wait and if last, go first.


Get the drift? Anything that will loosen the pattern will work – it gives the opportunity for new ideas to surface, new relationships to enter, and a new found enthusiasm may well find its way into your being so you can enjoy the moment. Hey, maybe even a whole day. It’s worth a shot!

10 Responses to Unhappy at Work
  1. I think it would not to say completely right that only men is responsible for women sadness. There may be lot of other reason. According to me only those women feel sad and gloomy whom are slacker and avoid her duties toward the house and child. Because the road which leads to success is full of sacrifices.

  2. Your idea seems very impressive and effective also. The opposite method is quite right thing to get rid of this sadness. I think this is not only for women rather men can also use it in life.

  3. Being a man, I have never had to worry about finger pointing and blame, but I can understand why women feel blue going to work. Work itself is a chore if you are in an industry which you have no love for. The idea of mixing up your day a little seems like a good one though.

  4. Great advise on her, thanyou so much, its about time i stared to make changes in my life but never had the bottle to try, iafter reading your article, i found a different approach to dealing with things so here goes!! wish me luck!

  5. Perhaps they are realizing that work is hard. They’ve made their point and now it’s time to go do easier things.
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  6. I think where a lot of women are unhappy at work, it’s because of themselves or other women. Men challenge us to be better, give us some inspiration and motivation to be as good as we can be. But sometimes our relationships with other women get in the way and make us feel bad about what we’re doing. It can sometimes be very distracting.

  7. I certainly agree Sylvia that the economy plays a big part in being distressed and unhappy. Its definately the reason for the majority of my worries right now.

  8. I might try this because I’m really struggling with both of my jobs. I do enjoy them and the people, I just feel like maybe I’m not being challenged enough. I do mix up the times I go to work so maybe now I need to make sure I have as much structure as possible. I can see that changing how I approach my day might help me get a little bit more motivated with it.

  9. I worked for many years, and I was actually one of the lucky people that enjoyed my job. But I got laid off, they just walked in one day and said bye bye. Now I don’t want to work for anyone again, so I am starting my own business. Now the only person who can fire me is me, and I like myself to much to do that!

  10. Everyone is unhappy and they feel the need to make everyone else feel as bad as they do. A never ending circle of hate and despair. We just have to go against the flow and be better than they are. Its really hard but the least we can do is try.

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