Resolutions so often turn to dust as old, deeply ingrained patterns fight for center stage. Think about all the changes you want to make as this New Year turns two days old.

Have you even kept you resolutions through the first day of the month?

Here is what I teach and help those who go through our Total Leadership Connections program understand: when stress is high we all tend to retreat back to behaviors that were there to protect us when we were kids. The patterns of over-pleasing,  avoiding,  behaving like a big, bad bully started long ago; when we feel threated or blamed there they are playing their role of protector…..whether we like it or not.

Our leadership development program tackles this issue and gives insight into those dark corners when you (all of us) flip out without any spam filters.

Here are some tips when you “fall off the wagon” of resolutions:

1. BE KIND TO YOURSELF: Just get up, brush yourself off and begin all over again
2. KNOW THE TERRITORY: Pay close attention to the specific people and places that are your most powerful triggers
3. HAVE A “TREAT” CLOSE AT HAND: Reinforce your new behaviors by giving yourself a “pat on the back” every time you don’t succumb to the old ways
4. TALK TO SOMEONE: Make your commitments out loud and let a few close allies know you are in the midst of change
5. Give 6 Weeks to See Real Differences: Research indicates that it takes that long for change to really take hold…..so

KEEP LOVING YOURSELF THROUGH THE PROCESS. And, HAPPY NEW YOU IN THIS NEW YEAR!!!!!